I’ve been busy writing for a few contests I plan to enter in the fall.  So, I’ve not had time to post.

I’ve also been searching for sites that would be helpful to people with various mental illnesses. I’ll be adding them to my link list.

My mood is  better since the doctor reduced the Topomax. I discussed with her about the Adderall I had and am still on and it’s effects they have found on the brain long term. She agreed with me and said that’s why I must one day get off the 15mg that I’m still taking, but she said the time to deal with it isn’t now. It would be cruel to put me through it.

So, the 7 years I was on 30 or so mg-I may have been on more-it was damaging my brain worse than a cocaine addict’s. Lovely. No wonder I look at that bottle of Adderall and wish I could take more. But, I have not the addictive personality or I would have no restraint.

They’ve done studies and Adderall changes brain structure faster than cocaine. Cocaine addicts relapse 93%-99% of the time. They have problems with feeling joy because of cocaines destructiveness. Then Adderall is found to do the same thing only faster. Go docs! I know that’s why I feel flat. I don’t necessarily feel depressed. I just don’t feel joy. It’s hard for me to feel it . I just pray to God that my brain over time can heal itself in that area.